Have you ever had a dream or huge goal that scared you?
A dream worth chasing, but that looked absolutely intimidating. Enough that you’d rather hide underneath a rock instead of going for it. If you answered yes then you are not alone.
In the first phase of starting your dream you experience a high amount of energy initially. You feel like it’s too good to be true. You are on cloud nine all the way.
Is this too good to be true?
Well it feels like that in the beginning. That stage of your dream where you feel invincible and ready to conquer the world. Your confidence is at an all-time high.
Eventually you start descending and you feel the struggle one cloud at a time. This can take you by surprise when it happens. Then the reality hits you.
Welcome to the second phase. This is called fear. It’d be easier if I could tell you that it would always be smooth sailing right?
If I did that then you would never truly be prepared for the different phases. There are phases of pursuing your dream that are inevitable.
It’s all part of the learning curve when you are trying to succeed at something. You have to be able to go through the fear. It will be the very thing that will either make you want it more or be the demise of your dream.
You get to decide which it will be. This second phase is what will bring doubt, anxiety and you will second guess yourself throughout it.
Did you know that fear can be good for you?
People find it hard to imagine that fear could actually be beneficial. Pursuing a goal that gets you out of your comfort zone can be scary. That usually isn’t the first thing that you want to cross off your to do list.
It feels better to do the things that are easier. Where you feel safe. Sure you might accomplish a thing or two when you do this.
Are you really accomplishing your bigger goal though?
Doing the simpler less intimidating things puts you into the third phase. Here is where you get to shake hands with procrastination.
Oh yes it is super comfortable in this phase. Now you don’t have to worry about anything that scares you. You have convinced yourself that you are in a good place.
It does feel good for a short while, but then your mind will start going back to your original goal. You will get involved in busy work. This is where you do things to make yourself look busy.
Procrastination still exists. You will start doing other things that are not even related to your goal. Other mediocre tasks will fill up your time.
So how do you move past the third phase?
Are you ready for it? I’m going to ask you to do something that will make you uncomfortable. Now is the ideal time to revisit the second phase.
Yes, the second phase will put you back with encountering fear again. Remember when I said that fear could be good? Well it is.
By facing what scares you the most with your goal you enter the fourth phase. In this phase you get to fight with your fear.
The way that you fight with it is by actually doing that very thing on your to do list. The thing that you have been putting off and the thing that got you excited in the first place.
Picture the worst case scenario. What could happen if you pursue it? You also have to ask yourself what is the best thing that could happen?
Visualize what that win might look like for you. Also, if it involves a rejection how can you find a way to bounce back and try again?
You see practice and persistence when pursuing your dream is what will set you apart. You will give yourself permission to try. When you do then you will not give up when you fail.
Failure in this pursuit is all part of the process. That is how you learn and get to hone your craft. When you embrace your fears and push through them anyway then you enter the last phase.
In the fifth phase is when you get to say hello to your confidence. It’s been there all along. You only have to shed the layers that have a tendency to cover it up.
Are you ready to go through the phases from start to finish?
Have you been pondering over a question that you aren’t sure about? Need advice on it? Submissions may be edited for clarity and your first name will be used unless you specify otherwise. If you would like to have your question featured on an upcoming “Ask Lucy” segment please email me at: hello@lulalucy.com
