Relationships can be challenging at any age but being in midlife opens your eyes even more. Navigating the challenge of relationships does not have to be hard. Have you reflected on past relationships, whether they were a friendship, marriage, or family member? As much as we would like them to be perfect, often they are imperfect. What defines imperfect? Well, that is up to you to decide. If you have ever found yourself at a crossroads in forgiving someone, letting go, or saving a relationship, then you know what I mean.
First, ask yourself what went wrong? It is not about playing the blame game. Instead, it recognizes something for what it was in that moment. It is so easy to misunderstand someone when there is a lack of communication. A heart-to-heart conversation is best versus texting someone. However, sometimes it is the hardest thing for two people to do. It is easier to make an excuse than sit down and talk, depending on the person.
I remember when I was a kid, it was always temporary if we got mad with a friend. As an adult, though, it is a different story. So, what do you do when a relationship suffers?
Ask Yourself Questions
Next, decide if you want to improve it. Why is this relationship important to you? Relationships are worth fighting for, but not if they are one-sided. It isn’t fair when only one person makes an effort. It is a two-way street and coming to an understanding that works for all. Many times, pride and our ego keep us from saving a relationship. When people make mistakes, they think it is too huge to fix them.
Try to mend the relationship. When you don’t try, bitterness settles in, you hold a grudge, you get depressed, and you end up looking like you had a lemon for breakfast. The challenge of relationships can also take a toll on your health and well-being.
If you try and your efforts are not well received, then it is time to process this. Do not blame yourself or the other person. Go ahead and vent in your way. Like they say, let them go with love. True friendships and relationships will always prevail when they come from a place of true love.
Stay in alignment with your values
Finally, forgiving yourself and the other person is what helps you move forward. It is up to them to continue saving the relationship or walk away from it. Remember to give yourself grace. Stay in continued faith because sometimes they come back around.
The critical thing to remember is that we are all human. You get to decide what is in alignment with your values. No one else has the power to determine that for you. You get to choose.
So, although you may be in mourning for a relationship that didn’t work out or you lost your best friend, remember this too shall pass. People change, some don’t, and in the end, it is about having peace in your life. You are in control of the direction of your life.
If the people dear to your heart understand that, then they will hopefully stay in your life. However, if they choose otherwise, it’s okay to wish them well. Continue to live your life and experience all the beautiful things regardless. So, if someone hasn’t told you that you are an extraordinary human today, guess what? You sure are, along with being worthy of love and happiness.